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| There are 22 entries in the glossary. |
| Pages: 1 |
| Palm Sunday & Ash Wednesday | Holidays originally created by the palm tree conglomerates around 1,500 years ago to sell more palm fronds and kept by the Christian religion because they didn't read the fine print when they bought it. |
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| PanDeism | Belief in God who is both PanTheistic and Deistic. |
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| Papacy | Efficient device for the expenditure of the labors of the many, and the talents of the enlightened, on the vanities of the few, and the terrors of the ignorant. |
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| Pentateuch (a.k.a. The 5 Books of Moses) | The first five books of the Bible supposedly written by Moses. The books cover a period of time from the beginning of the universe up to a point somewhat after the death of Moses, it's author. |
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| Perception of God | An obvious feeling that God exists, cares, and lives inside of you. (see Illusion) |
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| Persecution of Christians | According to Christians, being stopped by legal or other means from controlling the lives of every single person on the planet, in such ways as... |
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| Pilgrimage | Often resembling the Trail of Tears, this walk in the park is participated in by many people who feel sinning and occasional prayer may not be enough get on God's "good-side. |
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| Plan B | A "morning after" contraceptive, available over-the-counter in Europe. Widely known to be safe and effective, it has been banned by the FDA for use in America because it conflicts with the religious agenda of the current Administration (see Separation of Church and State). |
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| Pledge of Allegiance | A proclamation of belief in God embedded in a proclamation of loyalty to the USA. Only theists may proclaim their loyalty. |
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| Politician | A public servant who gets paid to collect money from people he doesn't know, in order to spend on programs to benefit other people he doesn't know. Whether or not the programs actually benefit anyone is irrelevant, as long as they make the politician look good. |
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| Pontius Pilate | A Roman bureaucrat, vilified by Christians for practicing good personal hygiene (washing his hands). Possibly the first documented case of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. |
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| Ponzi scheme | A scam in which people at the bottom of the pyramid get shafted, while those at the top are wealthy beyond belief. Both sides are convinced they are getting an incredible deal. (see religion) |
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| Pope | - An old guy in a silly hat who tries to tell others the way his infallible God wants them to behave and what He wants them to believe, though these statement may change depending on new facts discovered by man.
- Old geezer dressed as a Klansman and behaving as such.
- Technical engineer, specialized in turning clocks backwards.
- A man with a phallic symbol on his head.
- A misspelling of dope.
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| Prayer | - Communication with powerful beings for the purpose of:
- Begging them to change their plans,
- Begging them to fulfill their plans,
- Making food/drink safe/better to ingest/imbibe,
- Thanking them for all of the above.
- For asking that all Natural Laws be suspended for their personal needs.
- AKA: wishful thinking.
- Ritual and symbolic laziness.
- (see Witchcraft)
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| Priest | A man who wears a funny collar while sexually abusing young boys. |
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| Pro-choice[r] | Somebody who forgot to use a condom. |
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| Pro-life[r] | - Someone deeply concerned about your right-to-life when you're in the womb, and your right-to-life when you're dying in agony from some horrific disease, but at no other point in between.
- Somebody who doesn't want to use a condom.
- Somebody who doesn't want YOU to use a condom.
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| Prophecy | A veiled threat that actually happened, usually revealed after the event.
Many threats of a attack by Arabs have been received By the CIA/ FBI. And one actually happened. 9/11 was a fulfilled prophecy.
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| Prophet | Someone who becomes fabulously rich by always being wrong.
(alternative spelling: "profit")
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| Proselytising | Activity based on the deep religious philosophical tenet "I'm right and you're wrong!". |
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| Public prayer | - A practice prohibited by the mythical Jesus (see Matthew 6:5-8), but still performed by self-proclaimed Christians who say that forcing children listen to them will make the children better citizens.
- A ritual performed by hypocrites to show how pious they are and to make the "heathens" stand out when they don't join in.
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| Puritans | A group of Calvinist Fundamentalists who loved the idea of religious freedom so much that they couldn't be bothered to share it with anyone else. |
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Glossary V2.0 |